Wednesday, October 7, 2009

So, it's Thursday night and the week has already flown by. It has definitely been an interesting week in discovering that there are actually going to be people up here at Joshua who teach, that I don't agree with! hehe. It's something I've never really dealt with or been challenged with in my life up to this point. I'm learning that instead of blocking those people out I need to learn what they are teaching me and be humble enough to seek God and allow the Holy Spirit to reveal truth to me through His word and not go by what I THINK is right. This issue has really shaken me to my core this week.
Also, I've been attending church up here, which is The Well Community Church's services being broad casted. It's been nice because it feels like a little piece of home with me. They have been teaching on Nehemiah and having a holy discontent. In my understanding, to have a holy discontent basically means to have an issue or circumstance weigh on your heart so heavily that all you can do is pursue and follow it however you are led by God to do so. I've been hearing it over and over from it being taught but I never could figure out what my holy discontent was. I've just been telling myself I don't have one. I feel like through all the challenges I've been faced with this week God has allowed a holy discontent to rise to the surface of my heart and has laid a persistent uneasiness within me for something certain. It's cool but at the same time really awkward and uncomfortable. I really need prayer that God reveals truth to me and that I am only guided by the Holy Spirit and not by the words of man. I also need prayer for discernment and being able to distinguish what is from God and what is not from Him.
The cool thing about being in Joshua and having the opportunity to learn from all kinds of teachers and speakers and knowing that none of them are the same. I know I am here to solely draw closer to God and gain a deeper understanding of Him and who I am in Him. I am grateful that Joshua is not a place where I am being "forced" to learn a certain theology or doctrine, but rather I am being exposed to opposite views and having to wrestle with what is being put in front of me and at the end of the day I have to chose to be obedient to the Holy Spirit and allow Him to show me what is true. I feel privileged because of this but it definitely makes things a lot more difficult. Thanks for everyone who is praying for me. Honestly, I can feel people praying for me. As weird as that sounds, I know that I have the positive attitude I have and the excitement I have only because of prayer. Love you all!

I'm too lazy to upload pictures but if you go to you can see some pictures! :)

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